Mentoring, Coaching and Counseling

Posted on July 04, 2014 - 11:55 am

By special guest Doug Lawrence

I was giving a presentation on “Effective Mentoring” and was asked the question “What is the difference between mentoring and counseling?” I did provide an answer but you always do a self-assessment on your presentation afterwards and I thought I could have done better. I also obtained feedback from some valued colleagues that echoed my own thoughts that I could have responded better. What better way to address the question then by way of an article for our blog!

First off let’s agree that we will likely disagree on some of the definitions. I know that as I went through pages of research on the internet there was always the reference to mentoring being a senior person mentoring a more junior person. That definition is old news as “effective mentoring” is about the trusted relationship, it is about a two way relationship where both learn from each other, it is about the creation of a learning and development environment and it is about effective communication. The senior versus junior concept is what we call traditional mentoring and is fast becoming a thing of the past. Mentoring focuses on the building of a trusted relationship, personal and professional growth, effective communication and is typically a longer term relationship. I have some mentoring relationships that are 3-5 years in duration and still going strong. I must also mention that there is mentoring and then there is effective mentoring. The difference is whether or not the person that is the mentor can build a trusted relationship and has had some form of training. All too often I have people comment that after having had some training that we did not realize there was this much to mentoring!

Before we explore the definitions of each I want to comment on a couple of things. In a lot of the research that is out there that speaks to the “differences” between coaching, mentoring and counseling there is a common theme that you see. That common theme is that there are traces of each model in coaching, mentoring and counseling. What I mean by that is that within coaching there are some elements of mentoring and counseling and much the same applies if you were to look at any of these disciplines. What I did find though is that with counseling there is a path for more formal – higher education as it is a very specialized area. For example, an effective mentor would hand off to a professional counselor if they were dealing with a mentee that was experiencing depression. There are a number of situations where that rule would apply. In the case of coaching and mentoring there is a similar situation. There is a cross over that can take place where a coach may leverage some mentoring techniques and conversely a mentor may use some preliminary coaching techniques. What I strongly recommend though is that if you find yourself in that situation it is the ideal place to hand off to a mentor or a coach depending on the situation. There is a place for both in an organization and they actually work well together and complement each other. I recall a situation where a client had called and wanted me to come into their organization to do some mentoring. I had a discussion with them to better understand the opportunity. As it turns out, they were actually looking for a coach so I referred them to a colleague of mine that does professional coaching. The needs of the client were better met by ensuring that they had the right service and the right person to provide that service.

Here are some definitions for you to think about. Mentoring is a method of learning and development whereby the mentor uses his or her knowledge, expertise and experience to assist the mentee in developing critical thinking skills and to grow personally and professionally. This is a two way trusted relationship that is actually part of a learning and development environment where both parties grow from the relationship. It is not about telling the mentee what to do but more importantly it is about asking the right questions to guide them to the answers. The relationship is typically long term and will go through three phases (Trusting phase, learning and development phase and maintenance phase). The primary focus is on the personal growth and from that journey will be growth on the professional side. The mentee should not be a direct report.

Coaching, on the other hand, is a training method whereby an experienced or superior person transfers expertise to an employee by assigning various tasks to be completed while simultaneously giving advice and suggesting methods on how the task should be accomplished within the company or organization. Coaching involves skills development with a view to improving individual performance so as to achieve the organization’s performance objectives. Coaching relationships are typically shorter term relationships. Coaching is competence specific. In some coaching situations elements of mentoring are used in relation to the personal development of a client.

Counseling is defined as: 1) Counseling is the skilled and principled use of relationship to facilitate self- knowledge, emotional acceptance and growth and the optimal development of personal resources. The overall aim is to provide an opportunity to work towards living more satisfyingly and resourcefully. Counseling relationships will vary according to need but may be concerned with developmental issues, addressing and resolving specific problems, making decisions, coping with crisis, developing personal insights and knowledge, working through feelings of inner conflict or improving relationships with others, 2) Counseling is the application of mental health, psychological or human development principles, through cognitive, affective, behavioral or systemic interventions, strategies that address wellness, personal growth, or career development, as well as pathology, and 3) Counseling is a principled relationship characterized by the application of one or more psychological theories and a recognized set of communication skills, modified by experience, intuition and other interpersonal factors, to clients’ intimate concerns, problems or aspirations. Its predominant ethos is one of facilitation rather than of advice-giving or coercion. It may be of very brief or long duration, take place in an organizational or private practice setting and may or may not overlap with practical, medical and other matters of personal welfare. It is both a distinctive activity undertaken by people agreeing to occupy the roles of counselor and client and it is an emergent profession…. It is a service sought by people in distress or in some degree of confusion who wish to discuss and resolve these in a relationship which is more disciplined and confidential than friendship, and perhaps less stigmatizing than helping relationships offered in traditional medical or psychiatric settings.

There are some similarities as you can see but there is also some uniqueness to what each discipline provides. Mentoring is evolving as the business value it provides is recognized in a lot of organizations no matter their size. Mentoring is seen as being a solution that can address business challenges such as; aging workforce, talent shortages, succession planning/succession development, leadership talent shortages, mobile workforce, and disengaged employees to name a few. Organizations that are looking at diversity initiatives also look at how mentoring can play a role in diversity implementations. Effective mentoring is now taking the mentoring process to a higher level and is creating the paradigm that is long overdue.
When you look in your organization and are looking at which discipline you should explore, consider the fact there is likely a place for all three whether it be delivered internally or though external sources. Enable and empower your employees through a mentoring program and move your organization towards a mentoring culture – after all, “can you afford not to?”

Doug Lawrence is the founder of TalentC® a Human Resources solution provider. He has over 30 years of mentoring and leadership experience in both federal and provincial environments as well as the private sector. He has developed the world's only International Accredited Mentoring Training program. TalentC® was recently recognized by HR.com in the 2014 Leadership 500 Excellence Awards and was ranked 4th in the International Leadership Partner and Provider category.

References:
1. http://www.brefigroup.co.uk/coaching/coaching_and_mentoring.html
2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coaching
3. http://www.ccpa-accp.ca/_documents/NotebookEthics/What%20is%20Counselling%20A%20Search%20for%20a%20Definition.pdf

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